my mum

 I know a lot of you have been asking about my mum. Since her last treatment, she had been trotting along nicely under the care of my dad at our family home in canberra. She had been having good and bad days but was happy and still talking. The last time we had a conversation was Tuesday but my dad had warned me she hadn’t had such a good day, by Wednesday she wasn’t doing well and needed to see a doctor, by Thursday my dad brought her back to Sydney to see her doctors and for a scan to see what was going on. Unfortunately, she was in such a bad way this morning that she couldn’t have the scan. She was taken to a private hospital near us to try to stabilise her. There is no timeline the doctors can give us. Just keeping her comfortable, seeing what happens over the next few days and the Doctors will talk to my Dad on Monday about what is going on.

me and my mum
me and my gorgeous mum a la 1970’s. Would you believe she was in her late 20’s!

Seeing her tonight was probably one of the hardest things I’ve had to do……………..ever. I stood at the doorway with little Elodie in my arms but it was as if I wasn’t there. There was no smile, no recognition, it was as if the doorway was empty. I panicked because of course your own mother knows who you are. I sat and talked and tried to keep the conversation light and cheery. She can’t talk or smile but can hear us. Oh can I just turn back the clock. To a time before her diagnosis. When I thought melanoma was just a bad mole you had cut out and went on your merry way again.

And thank you for your sweet and kind words. I know each of us has experienced this time with a loved one and it is never easy. No one has the answers, or the right words or a magic pill to make it all go away. You can’t think further ahead than the next day and need to put your brave face on.

Comments

  1. What a beautiful photo to remember how your mum looked when you were a baby! Hang in there Corrie…you’re doing beautifully and the support and love you’re giving her is worth more than gold.

  2. I am sorry.
    This sounds like a horrible illness, for your mother, for all of you caring for her. This is very sad.

  3. Sending you best wishes and a hug
    Christine

  4. I’m very sorry. I’m sending you a big hug, Silvia

  5. Corrie we never know how much people can hear and understand, keep being there for her as much as you can. Having a parent not know you is the hardest thing in the world to come to terms with, believe me, I know. My heart and my prayers are with you. Big Hugs Linda

  6. I am so sorry for you and your beautiful family. Love lasts forever!

  7. Oh Corrie – thinking of you!

  8. Thinking of you. Be with her all you can, if you can. And never be ashamed of the tears. You will all need them. A big hug to you and yours. Cherrie

  9. I’ve been through this too Corrie, I lost my own beautiful Mum four years ago, and it is such an awful, horrible time. Waiting. Wishing. Not knowing.
    Thinking of you.
    x

  10. dest wishes to all of you! that’s a terrible thing, and you have to be strong… hugs from our family

  11. Sometimes you can’t even think as far ahead as the next day. My prayers remain with you and your family, Corrie.

  12. Corrie, I’m so so sorry. It’s so hard to see your Mom like this. A big hug to you, your family, and especially your Dad.

  13. I am so sorry to hear this.

    That’s a beautiful photos.

    Thinking of you and sending hugs. x

  14. Mucha fuerza para u.sted y su famila.
    Reciban la bendición de Dios.
    Un abrazo.

  15. Nice photo. I am sorry

  16. I’m so sorry to hear about your mother. i’m sending you all the best wishes and prayers.

  17. My thoughts and prayers are with you at this time to give you and your family the strength you need. Keep talking to your Mum about the children and day-to-day things – she will know that you are there and she can hear you.

  18. My dad passed away last year. While I’m now wiping away the tears, I just want to say is stay strong and take in every moment. You are doing great.

  19. I will be holding you all in my thoughts Corrie.

  20. Sending you much love & prayers Corrie! Such a sweet photo of your mom. xo

  21. Thinking of you. I hope today is a better day. x

  22. Mucho ánimo a toda la familia y confiar en Dios ,besos a todos

  23. New follower today…love your blog (and style). I was diagnosed with a stage 2 melanoma when I was 26. Luckily, while pregnant, my obgyn found it and I was given plastic surgery to remove it (and 3 inches diameter all around…on my neck). So, I understand (sort of) the seriousness of your mom’s condition. My heart goes out for you. There definately needs to be more EDUCATION about this terrible disease. Prevention is the best (and sometimes only) cure. Please, please get yourself checked by a dermatologist. It runs in families. I just lost a good friend 3 years ago. It’s torture. Just wanted to tell you that I am praying for your family through this terrible ordeal.
    jamie in arizona

  24. Watching a mother slip away is just so painful. And that look you get when they just seem to look through you or not recognise you at all is totally heartbreaking.

    Thinking of you during this time.

  25. Corrie I am so sorry to heart this. We’ll continue to pray for you and your family.

  26. Oh Corrie, I’m so sorry. I can’t imagine how hard it must’ve been to see your mum like that. Will be thinking of you xxx PS I love that photo of you and your mum – beautiful!!

  27. Your Mum sure is beautiful. Kind thoughts are heading out to you today. I lost my mother to cancer 10 years ago and is the most devastating thing to go through. Nothing can ever prepare you for it, EVER. I am so sorry that you have to go through this. Lots of love going out to you. x

  28. I lost my dad in November. It was so hard seeing him so sick. I know what you’re going through to some degree as it is different with mom vs. dad. Take care and I pray for peace and comfort during this hard time for your family.

  29. Sending love xx

  30. It looks like you’re doing a great job keeping a brave face! It must be so difficult to write about your mum just now.
    I hope you’re letting retrodaddy take care of you a little. ((((hugs))))

  31. Best wishes to all of you, in Holland we say: sterkte

  32. Thinking of you Corrie xxx

  33. your mum looks so beautiful in that picture!
    i hope the drs are coming up with some strategies to help her… and keep doing what you’re doing, when the brain is affected, the body and brain don’t always co-operate, but it doesn’t mean she can’t hear or see you
    xoxo

  34. Corrie I am so sad to hear that your mum is back in hospital. Just remember that you dont have to be strong all the time, and you are still her daughter. I have been through this with my FIL and it is very hard but strong families stick together and support each other. Sending you lots of hugs xxxxx

  35. I’m so sorry Corrie, be strong

  36. thinking of you corrie

    x

  37. Cherish the memories – HUGS.

  38. I am so sorry…I’ve been there and understand. I am sending prayers your way. She was, in that picture, absolutely “stunning”! What a beautiful Mum…..keep talking to her, it’s important. Would hug you if I could.

  39. Its all so sad Corrie. Sending all our love.
    That’s a beautiful photo of your Mum.

  40. Lovely picture of the two of you. You look like your mum.

  41. This is so sad Corrie and hard to be living through for each one of you. May God give you and your Mum peace, strength and comfort. xxx

  42. {{hugs}} to you Corrie, keep strong.

    xxMiriam

  43. I am so sorry Corrie. My prayers are with all of you right now. Not only are you doing such a wonderful thing for your mom by being there for her, you are also teaching your children such an important life lesson about love, family and stength. I hope you find some comfort in your memories and pictures such as beautiful as this one.
    Maria

  44. I will keep your parents and your sweet family in my prayers

  45. hugs xxx

  46. Corrie, you are all in my prayers. Thinking of you and your family at this tough time.

  47. so sad for you Corrie, I hope she is comfortable.

  48. That’s a beautiful photo Corrie. Lots of love and positive thoughts going to you and your family… Kate x

  49. I can feel the sadness in your post and am very sorry you are going through this. Cancer can be so cruel. Wishing you strength in this tough time.

  50. Such a sad time for you Corrie. All the best to you and your whole family.

  51. Try to focus on the happy memories when you can. Thinking of you. Hugs!

  52. Dear Corrie,
    Sending strength and love to you and your family during this sad and difficult time.
    Love Christine xo

  53. Your mum is so beautiful. I am so, so sad for you that this awful illness is robbing you of your precious mother. All my thoughts are with you.

  54. Corrie, much love, strength and prayers to you and your family. Your Mum sounds like such an amazing woman. I bet you make your Mum and Dad so very proud… love love love xxx

  55. Much love to you and the family. You are in my thoughts.
    Big hugs xoxo

  56. Oh Darling! Hugs galore truly xxxxxxxxxxxxx that is a beautiful photo of you and her. So pretty. Thinking of you xxx

  57. I am so sorry you are going through this Corrie.

    I was with my Nanna as she passed away this week and it was very traumatic for me as I am very close to her. It all happened so quickly for her – less than 3 weeks from her blood condition turning into leukemia and it was pneumonia in the end. For her I am very glad she didn’t have to suffer for long and glad I was with her and she knew.

    Sending you some big hugs xxx

  58. What a spunky Mummy you have :) And what a gorgeous photo to remember happy times with.
    Praying for your Mum and sending hugs your way.

  59. Corrie, you are in my thoughts.

  60. Corrie
    God knows, and knows all things. And He gives us comfort. When we believe that all the time we are His and we are safe in His hands.
    Thinking of you and your family.
    With love
    Nina

  61. I am so sorry to hear about your mum Corrie. Sending you lots of love and strength. Hang on to all those beautiful memories.

  62. The photo of you and your Mum is just beautiful Corrie. She looks like such a gorgeous person. I am so sorry to read about what you’ve been going through. I hope you are ok and I wish you every bit of strength possible at this time.

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